By RON “MAD DOG” HIGGINS, Journal Sports
BATON ROUGE – Somebody was knocking on my front door Tuesday morning.
Through the peephole, I saw a middle-aged man wearing a Skippy the Wonder Bichon WWSD (What would Skippy do?) bracelet and T-shirt that read, “Skippy always makes the grass greener on the other side.”
I opened the door.
“Hello, my name is Hilly Farnsworth, president of your neighborhood association,” the man said. “Is this the home of Skippy the Wonder Bichon?”
“Yes, but I have to say in Skippy’s defense he didn’t know it was against association rules to use a real donkey for his pin-the-tail-on-donkey game at his birthday party,” I quickly responded.
“No, I’m here because to acquire over the last two football seasons, our neighborhood association board has tracked Sklppy’s `relief’ work in our yards while he’s made his picks,” Hilly said. “The yards he frequented the most consistently won our neighborhood `Yard of the Month’ awards.
“Can you have Skippy come to the door?”
“Skip, there’s someone here to see you from the neighborhood association,” I yelled.
Skippy arrived at the front door with a papaya smoothie in one paw and a sausage biscuit in the other.
“Skippy, I’m Hilly Farnsworth, president of your neighborhood association, Hilly said. “I’m here because we’d like you to become the first non-human member on our Yard of the Month judging committee. Your exemplary work as a sniffer picker speaks for itself.”
“I’ll do it,” Skipperoo said. “But I don’t want neighbors peeking through their blinds while I’m perusing their yards and flower beds. I don’t do my `business’ in front of an uninvited audience.
“Now, let me autograph your Skippy shirt and get out of here, Hilly. You’re interrupting my snack before breakfast.”
Last week, Skippy was 6-4 to improve to 24-16 on the season. I was 7-3 and now 31-9 on the year.
Here’s Week 5:
South Alabama (2-2, 1-0 Sun Belt at No. 14 LSU (3-1, 1-0 SEC), Tiger Stadium, Baton Rouge, Saturday, 6:45 p.m. (SEC Network)
Betting line: LSU favored by 22
The skinny: The Jaguars from Mobile have scored more points (135) in their last two games than LSU has scored all season (133). Their two-deep depth chart is littered with FBS transfers who play with chips on their shoulders.
Mad Dog’s pick: Tigers’ Tails Tales of Two Halves 41, Gulf Shores Refugees 24
Skippy’s pick: LSU
No. 2 Georgia (3-0, 1-0 SEC) at No. 4 Alabama (3-0, 0-0 SEC), Bryant-Denny Stadium, Tuscaloosa, Saturday, 6:30 p.m. (ABC)
Betting line: Georgia favored by 2
The skinny: I’ll take Georgia coach Kirby Smart, whose team traffic violations count is 25 and counting since January 2023, over first-year Alabama coach Kalen DeBoer, who looks and sounds like a junior high woodshop teacher.
Mad Dog’s pick: Team Speed Trap 27, Nick Saban Has Left the Building 24
Skippy’s pick: Alabama
Mississippi State (1-3, 0-1 SEC) at No. 1 Texas (4-0, 0-0 SEC) at DKR-Stadium, Austin, Saturday, 3:15 pm. (SEC Network)
Betting line: Texas favored by 39
The skinny: Mississippi State recently received an anonymous $8 million donation for the football program. A grand gesture but there’s no in-season free agency portal for the Bulldogs to buy players.
Mad Dog’s pick: Arch’s Army 54, Clang-bangers 10
Skippy’s pick: Texas
Kentucky (2-2, 0-2 SEC) at No. 6 Ole Miss (4-0, 0-0 SEC), Vaught-Hemingway Stadium, Oxford, Saturday, 11 a.m. (ABC)
Betting line: Ole Miss favored by 17½
The skinny: The Rebels, rising to No. 5 nationally after feasting on a non-conference smorgasbord of assorting creampuffs such Not A-Wake Forest and 2024 CMA breakout artist winner Georgia Southern, finally play their first SEC game.
Mad Dog’s pick: Kiff-Kiff’s Commandos 38, My Old Kentucky Home Needs Renovations 24
Skippy’s pick: Ole Miss
No. 21 Oklahoma (3-1, 0-1 SEC) at Auburn (2-2, 0-1 SEC), Jordan-Hare Stadium, Auburn, Saturday, 2:40 p.m. (ABC)
Betting line: Oklahoma favored by 2
The skinny: Two teams that lost SEC openers at home last weekend – Oklahoma steamrolled by Tennessee and Auburn choking it guts out vs. Arkansas – meet in a game that could have Duke Mayo Bowl implications.
Mad Dog’s pick: Sooners Say Hold The Mayo 45, Hugh Freeze’s So You Think You’ve Got QB Talent Search 24
Skippy’s pick: Auburn
In other games:
No. 25 Texas A&M (3-1, 1-0 SEC) vs. Arkansas (3-1, 1-0), AT&T Stadium, Arlington, Saturday, 2:30 p.m. (ESPN)
Betting line: Texas A&M favored by 3½
Mad Dog’s pick: Six-Pack Sam’s Northwest Arky Hydration Specialists 31, College Station Cult 28
Skippy’s pick: Arkansas
No. 15 Louisville (3-0, 1-0 ACC) at No. 16 Notre Dame (3-1), Notre Dame Stadium, Notre Dame, 2:30 p.m. (Peacock)
Betting line: Notre Dame favored by 6½
Mad Dog’s pick: Magically Delicious Leprechauns 27, Kentucky Featherheads 24
Skippy’s pick: Louisville
No. 20 Oklahoma State (3-1, 0-1 Big 12) at No. 23 Kansas State (3-1, 0-1 Big 12), Bill Snyder Family Stadium, Manhattan, Saturday, 11 a.m. (ESPN)
Betting line: Kansas State favored by 5
Mad Dog’s pick: The Other Manhattan 34, Git Along Little Stillwater Dogies 33
Skippy’s pick: Kansas State
Virginia Tech (2-2, 0-0 ACC) at No. 7 Miami (4-0, 0-0 ACC), Hard Rock Stadium, Miami Gardens, Friday, 6:30 p.m. (ESPN)
Betting line: Miami favored by 20
Mad Dog’s pick: South Florida Druglords 35, Virginia Technical Institute for Moonshine and Meth Studies 20
Skippy’s pick: Miami
Wisconsin (2-1, 0-0 Big Ten) at No. 13 USC (2-1, 0-0 Big Ten), Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum, Los Angeles, Saturday, 2:30 p.m. (CBS)
Betting line: USC favored by 14½
Mad Dog’s pick: Perfectly Basted Cali Dudes 41, The Other White Meat 24
Skippy’s pick: USC
Contact “Mad Dog” and Skippy at ronhigginsmedia@gmail.com